Variously ascribed-

The Times:
Read by the people who run the country.

Daily Mirror:
Read by the people who think they run the country.

Guardian:
Read by the people who think they ought to run the country.

Morning Star:
Read by the people who think the country ought to be run by another country.

Daily Mail:
Read by the wives of the people who own the country.

Financial Times:
Read by the people who own the country.

Daily Express:
Read by the people who think that the country ought to be run as it used to be.

Daily Telegraph:
Read by the people who think it still is.

The Sun:
Their readers don’t care who runs the country as long as she has big tits.

~ by whensquirrelsattack on December 26, 2006.